Tuesday, April 22, 2008'
i love elmo!
What is a fulfilling life? What fufils life? There are many want-ness in individual but how much can we achieve and given? There are so many things i want to be and own till i felt so complicated. What exactly do i want? What exactly am i doing now and what are the purposes? Like my grandfather always advices me , rolling stone gather no more. In another word , it means ' jack of all trade , master of none.' I always listen to my grandparents since they brought me up healthily and much fortunate than many other children. I love them and i always felt love from them only.
I knew rather i was a special child. Since i was young. I seldom do and like things like many commoners do. I think and look things at differently. I treat and love unusually. It explains a couple of times i don't click with strangers well. No affinity to people i am suppose to befriend.
Sometimes , i really have no idea what i was thinking and why i do things this way. I was pretty mad at myself leaving the job in night safari as a show presenter. I fought real hard for the job that only a lady and i got chosen in a pool of 20 interviewees. I told myself to work forward in it but i left still. I knew entertainment line was for me but still.
There are things i miss them and there are those which i forgo and forget. There are some which i can't bear to let go vice versa.
I think i should just expose myself wider to the world. There are still many things worth trying. try it before i do not get a chance to do so. I just feel life is fragile. Alright , shall stop here.
Friday, April 04, 2008'
i love elmo!
I guessed my dog was put to sleep this morning. I know it sounds stupid to say that it came to find me in my dream before it moves on.
It became a scenario whereby i was at home alone , it came into my house where i very first adopt it. It came over me and i hug it really tight and just a while it force itself away from me and ran out of the door , i remember calling it but it ignore me. I guessed it just want to move on. I was very upset about it that cried but then i was also glad that at least it remembers who am i. Bother to find me even when it is moving on.
What made my felt good was that , it left remembering a owner like me. Hope it is going somewhere better......